Why Salaam-E-Ishq failed to get a salaam from audience. On Wahiyat Wednesday

Salaam-E-Ishq, starring Salman Khan, Anil Kapoor, Priyanka Chopra, and others, released on January 26, 2007. On Wahiyat Wednesday, we tell you all things wrong with the film.

There is a term in Bengali known as ‘joga khichuri’, loosely translated as mixed or a jumbled-up concoction of several things. And that is how we would like to describe the 2007 film, Salaam-E-Ishq. An odd blend of stars, stories and forcefully intertwined relationships resulted in the disaster that Salaam-E-Ishq turned out to be. This day, January 26, marks 15 years of Salaam-E-Ishq, and we sincerely hope the makers never want to revive the joga khichuri. Hop onto the Wahiyat Wednesday train and buckle your seatbelts, for you might want to hop out of it at the very first stop.

Nikkhil Advani directed Shah Rukh Khan’s Kal Ho Naa Ho right before he plunged into Salaam-E-Ishq in 2007. And we understand, mistakes happen. Salaam-E-Ishq was made with a stellar star cast. In fact, most of the big names in 2007 were put into the cauldron of Salaam-E-Ishq. Namely, Govinda, Salman Khan, Anil Kapoor, Priyanka Chopra, Juhi Chawla, Akshaye Khanna, Ayesha Takia, John Abraham, Vidya Balan, Shannon Esra, Sohail Khan and Isha Koppikar.

Now, every film that has A-lister stars, drama, dance, emotions, action sequences, perfect songs, memory loss, affairs in them can’t be a hit. If that were the case, no film in the world would be considered a flop. Salaam-E-Ishq too had all of it, but it was an inside-out kind of situation. Let us explain this with a birthday cake situation. For instance, if the ‘happy birthday’ written atop a cake with icing found a place in the middle layer and a plain base found its way on the top, it would be mentioned on the list of cake failures. Get our point now? If you don't, that's okay too.

However, the only good thing about the film is its music album - Salaam-E-Ishq title track, Dil Kya Kare, Ya Rabba, Tenu Leke, and more.

Salaam-E-Ishq comprised 6 stories, poorly huddled into one. More so, they were apparently co-related, but it looked so forced that you would hit pause, and search if the celebs working together had inter-personal conflicts in real-life. For instance, Priyanka Chopra (Kamna) had a hard time choosing between her career and Salman Khan (Rahul) for almost nothing. Par context kya hain bhai? And on the other hand, Akshaye Khanna (who plays Shiven) in his story with Ayesha Takia (Gia), develops cold feet right after dancing to Tere Hathon Vich Mehendi Ka Rang Khila Hain, Tujhe Sapno Da Changa Mehboob Mila Hain. But why even wait for that traumatising moment of smiling for the cameras and touching relatives’ feet? We mean getting cold feet before marriage is not wrong, but there should be some decency involved. At least don’t ghost your bride, yaar. Cards batt chukein hai! Totally uncool behaviour. But that’s not even the worst part.

After Shiven ghosts Gia right before their wedding and runs off, he suddenly realises what a huge mistake it was. And if we may call that Bollywood-y at all, he runs off to Gia, when she finally decides to get married to a ‘sane’ guy and creates chaos at her wedding. And the (un)expected happens. Gia says yes to Shiven, who once ghosted her from their wedding. *Facepalm*

We will not pakao you with all the six stories, but here’s a last one, promise. We know taxi drivers falling in love with rich people is ‘a thing’ in Bollywood. But just because Raja Hindustani (oops) was a hit, doesn’t mean you bring the same element over and over again. Yes, talking about Govinda and Shannon Esra’s relationship. Shannon, who plays Stephanie in the film, comes to India to hunt for her lover and hops into Govinda, aka, Raju’s taxi. But little did she know that she was stepping into her future chariot. In the process of looking for Stephanie’s lover, Raju falls in love with her. And as typical a Bollywood film can get, Stephanie reciprocates. Does it result in a happily ever after? We don’t want to know.