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This Is The Most Common Question To Ask A Friend — And It's Way Less Helpful Than It Seems

This Is The Most Common Question To Ask A Friend — And It's Way Less Helpful Than It Seems

HuffPost
Tuesday, December 17, 2024 2:10 PM GMT

Here's why, and what to ask instead.

When a friend is going through a hard time, you want to be there for them. But there’s one super common and well-meaning question you’re bound to ask that could be getting in the way of truly supporting them:

How are you?

Often, this feels more like a perfunctory greeting or social nicety than a genuine inquiry about someone’s well-being.

“While well-intentioned, it usually doesn’t create the space for a meaningful or vulnerable response,” Washington, D.C., psychologist Marie Land told HuffPost.

Many of us have been conditioned to respond to a “how are you” with pat responses like, “Fine, thanks,” “Not bad” or “Hanging in there.” It doesn’t typically encourage the kind of deeper conversation you may be hoping to have.

Read full story on HuffPost
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