T&T Supermarket is more than just a grocery store — it helped me learn the language I resisted as a kid

This First Person column is written by Bill Chow, a second-generation Canadian who is a teacher in Mississauga, Ont. For more information about CBC's First Person stories, please see the FAQ.

"Nǐ hǎo, qǐng wèn nǐ men de dòu bàn jiàng zài nǎ lǐ? 你好,請問你們的豆瓣醬在哪裡?" asked a customer in Mandarin.

"Sorry, I do not speak Mandarin, but I would be more than happy to help you with whatever you are looking for," I replied in English. 

The woman said she was looking for fermented chili bean paste in English. 

Unfortunately, I still didn't know what that was, so I asked her for the Cantonese name of the product.

When I still didn't understand what she was asking for, the woman raised her voice and yelled at me in English. 

"What kind of f---ed up Chinese are you? I said it in Mandarin, English and Cantonese and you still do not know what I am looking for?" After venting at me, she stormed off in a huff into the other aisles of the store.   

The customer's frustration was nothing new to me. As a second-generation Chinese Canadian, I've felt the pressure to speak, read and write Chinese fluently my whole life. Growing up, my command of the Chinese language had often been described by family and friends as being at a "baby level" or what I would like to call the "Swiss cheese" level — with large numbers of empty holes. 

However, I wanted to move past the Swiss cheese level of Cantonese. 

I was born in Sarnia, Ont. My parents were from the Guangdong province of China but grew up in Hong Kong. They spoke fluent Cantonese and wanted me to stay connected to my culture but there were few Chinese speakers in our small city. 

So, when I turned five, I started going to Saturday Chinese school, but nothing clicked with me. After eight years of this additional schooling, I convinced my mom to let me drop out. She relented but said, "Son, there will be a day you will regret not learning Chinese."

She was right. Every time I went back to Hong Kong to meet family, I realized the gaping holes left in my life from not speaking the language.

Sixteen years had passed since that conversation when one day, I came across a T&T Supermarket job fair and it seemed like a sign.

It was 2008 and I was working full-time as a secondary school teacher in the Toronto area, but I decided to apply. I got an interview right on the spot and they gave me the opportunity that I was looking for — a part-time job working in a Chinese-speaking environment.