I was raped at university. Here's why I never reported it

Warning: This First Person column contains graphic content and may be triggering for those who have experienced​ ​​​sexual violence or know someone affected by it. It is written by Meghan Simard who lives in Toronto. For more information about CBC's First Person stories, please see the FAQ. 

Back to school is a hard time for me every year. It aligns with the anniversary of my rape at university in 2014. This anniversary was made even harder by the news coming out of Western University.

Police are investigating four reported sexual assaults since school began this month. On TikTok and other social media platforms, there have been allegations of more sexual assaults. It might be tempting to look at this as a Western problem, or a class of 2021 problem. It's not.

Every year, approximately 600,000 sexual assaults occur in Canada. An estimated five per cent of sexual assaults against people 15 or older were reported to police. This makes sexual assault the violent crime least likely to be reported to police. I am one of the 95 per cent who does not have an official report of my  sexual assault — but not for lack of trying.

I was raped in my third year of university by a so-called friend. I had turned down his sexual advances earlier in the week, but agreed to watch a movie with him and two other people. When I arrived at his house for the movie, the other people were nowhere to be found. I told him twice I didn't want to have sex. I tried to leave. I removed his hands from my breasts and genitals four times. I still remember the moment when I realized what was going to happen, whether I wanted it or not.

Distraught, I turned to institutions that should have protected me for support. I received next to none.

I went to Kingston General Hospital to have a rape kit done. At the request of the nurses, I recited my story at least twice but no one wrote anything down. I surrendered my jeans and underwear. I expect they have since been destroyed to make room for clothing from more recent rapes.