How Do I Keep My Parents From Moving In With Us?
The New York Times
After opening her home during the pandemic, a reader would like to set boundaries.
When the pandemic lockdown began last year, I brought my elderly parents from New York City to live with my husband, our adult kids (who also came home) and me in our home in the suburbs. My parents stayed until July. Since then, they have visited for long weekends and other stays (driven back and forth by me). My problem: I don’t want to live with my parents, but they’ve begun hinting that they’d like to live with us or spend the summer with us, though they never explicitly say so. My parents are very old, but they’re still able to care for themselves. (I do their big shopping for them.) I love them, but I don’t want them here full time. How do I handle this? MARIA I get the two-step of your parents’ shy hints and your reluctance to hurt their feelings. Still, I think the kindest thing here is to have a direct conversation with them. Living with you or staying put are not their only options. Why not help them explore some other possibilities?
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