'Different to back home': Newcomers navigate what feels odd, undisciplined in Western education

Aline Muhongayire's son was acting out in school. Nothing too serious — having a hard time focusing, wiggling in his seat and quickly losing interest in activities.

It was nothing that could possibly warrant 16 phone calls and notes from the teacher in just kindergarten and Grade 1, she thought.

It left the Rwandan-Canadian mother mystified. Why wasn't the teacher disciplining her child? Why wasn't this dealt with inside the classroom?

This year, Calgary schools are adjusting to another wave of newcomers entering the system, stretching language and settlement programs. 

And for those students and families, the challenge isn't just to learn English and catch up on math. It's also figuring out what a Western school system expects.

Because that's very different from what's expected in many of the countries these families are immigrating from — especially when it comes to physical discipline and homework, say families and those who support them in the Calgary school system.

It's a confusing landscape where each party is assuming the other has responsibility. The child can get lost in that, unless they take on responsibility to navigate this new world for themselves.

This was our story. When CBC Calgary reached out to young adults in local East African communities and offered to mentor us to tell a news story of importance to our communities, we thought back to our own experience in school — of sometimes feeling like we were on our own, like we had less support from our parents than Western peers or than teachers seemed to expect. 

We watched other newcomers struggle, and we wanted to know if this feeling was widespread and why it's happening.

That's why Muhongayire shared her experience. She has four children and immigrated from Rwanda seven years ago.

In Rwanda, classrooms are intentionally pretty bare. There might be a multiplication table posted, but rarely would you see children's artwork or anything that could be distracting.

The expectation is that in the class, children sit and focus, and the teacher is empowered to enforce that discipline.

"The classrooms (in Calgary) are so very distracting," she said. "How do you want a child to concentrate with all those colours? Why don't you put up things that are going with the lesson that you are (teaching). At least he will see formulas."