America’s maxing out its bah-humbug energy
CNN
Look, fam. Let’s just acknowledge things are kinda crappy.
Look, fam. Let’s just acknowledge things are kinda crappy. Four days to Christmas, the Most Wonderful Time of the Year, and the government is about to shut down for an indeterminate time, throwing life into upheaval for thousands of federal workers and the millions of Americans who depend on them to, among other things, keep the airports functioning during peak holiday travel. In this Dickensian episode of America in Decline, Ebenezer Scrooge isn’t just some rich guy — he’s the richest guy on the planet. And this holiday season, he’s going after everyone. (Unless, of course, you’re part of a far-right German party with ties to neo-Nazis — those guys he’s cool with.) And in case that wasn’t enough, there’s a rash of winter storms threatening to snarl that last-minute trip to the mall because you forgot — again — to get the dog pajamas for the Christmas morning Instagram. Maybe while you’re out you can grab a latte to power through the late-night wrapping marathon… but then you remember Starbucks’ unionized workers are on strike and you feel conflicted about crossing the picket line. Oh well, just make some coffee at home on the new French press you just ordered from Amazon… aw, crap. Wait, and there might be mysterious flying objects over New Jersey, and half of America is making thirsty memes about an alleged assassin? What next, Party City is going out of business? (Yes, yes it is. Also, the New Jersey thing: It’s probably just planes.) What. Is. Happening?
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